Disclaimer: Staying true to the title of this blog, here I rant.
The United States Navy has bred it's own form of codependency.
The more I experience this phenomena called the Navy Wife, the more I crave access to mainland civilian individuals. The more I infiltrate this culture, the less I want to be a part of it, and not for each individual, but the general effect. The title, Navy Wife, could arguably be considered a syndrome. Symptoms? Anxiety, neediness, caddiness. Feelings of abandonment, and resentment. Depression and hopelessness leading to avoidance and isolation and sometimes recklessness. I fear this quiet hysteria just might be contagious.
Before contracting Navy Wife, I was a self-sufficient, professional and productive contributing member of society that other professionals respected and revered. I was confident, important and successful.
Now, I feel the hysteria creep in when he leaves me alone. It's foriegn and very unattractive.
"Hi. My name is Brandi, and I'm codependent."
What happened?!
The side effects of yanking a girl with significant inertia (see November post, "Great is the day...") from her civilian life and isolating her on an island while shipping her husband off for months at a time. Oh! And leaving her with little to no job prospects to occupy her time and make her feel productive.
(Side bar: Reviewing my words I realize that, most likely, they will be grossly misunderstood. It appears that I'm insulting my peers, ungrateful for my life, and unhappy with my husband. Unfortuntate, because absolutely inaccurate. Continue.)
I embrace being Navy Wife positive, because it supports Michael and his chosen calling. And while it's terminal with no cure, it's certainly treatable. Those good days I get with my Hubby increase those antibodies. It flares up occasionally but when the fever subsides, my immune system is stronger, and I can survive the next infection. Those who suffer know what I speak of.
